Do you ever think I'm such an idiot?

I love my husband with all of my heart. I wouldn't change anything but I have to wonder what the heck. I could be much better off and have the life I had always dreamed of. I think I was scared. I had so many chances. Sometimes I think, what an idiot. Does anyone else? I don't have any regrets and I'm happy. I love my husband. I can handle the problems. But sometimes I do wonder am I a glutton for punishment? I am not completely serious. In fact, I'm laughing. I'm a stepmom. It's hard.